Welcome to the first post in our Personal FAQs series, where we will be exploring questions that can serve us as we continuously recenter, realign, and move forward with clarity throughout our lives.
To make it easier to have questions that can help based on where we are and what we need at any juncture, we’ll be looking at five different FAQs domains.
The Five Personal FAQ Domains:
- Identity & Purpose
- Work & Contribution
- Decision-Making & Direction
- Integration & Rhythm
- Growth & Legacy
Having core FAQs across all domains isn’t about reaching final answers. It’s about staying present to who we’re becoming and how that impacts other aspects of our life and body of work.
However, our first domain is where they all have their genesis and foundation.
We’re beginning with the domain at the center of everything: Identity & Purpose.
We think of identity as something we discover. But the truth is, it is something that we continue to uncover. It evolves. And when it does, our purpose can as well. That’s why the pairing is important.
The key is to understand that for both, change is always part of the equation in some form.
In my book, Adjusted Sails: What does this make possible? I share a personal experience with this. When my daughter got married, and I was facing that empty-nest season, I started by asking the usual questions: Is she okay? What does she need? How can I support her?
But the more important questions were not about her at all. They were about me and my role in life. What was I going to do now? Who would need me? How could I adjust to MY new life? Those questions were harder. I was unprepared for them.
Our roles will always change. And with those changes, who we are beneath them and how we define purpose for ourselves is something we’re invited to revisit again and again.
That season of navigating the empty nest was a significant disruption to my sense of identity and purpose. At the time, family was the core of how I defined both. But over the years, and through many transitions since, that definition has continued to expand.
That is, once again, why this domain is so important. This is the root system. Before clarity in strategy, productivity, or even alignment, we need to be anchored in who we are and why we’re here. For solopreneurs and professionals, especially those building values-driven lives and businesses, identity isn’t just personal—it’s structural.
Identity & Purpose FAQs:
The questions that helped me navigate transitions like going from full-time single mom to someone exploring new callings weren’t always the ones I expected.
I didn’t need grand revelations. I needed grounding. I needed prompts that gave me room to be honest. Questions that invited curiosity rather than demanded clarity.
That’s how these FAQs work best. They aren’t here to define us. They’re here to help us uncover what’s trying to emerge.
- What qualities in myself feel most alive, most true, in this season?
- Who am I becoming by choice, not just by circumstance?
- If someone were to describe the legacy I’m living in this season, what would I want them to say?
- What environments or moments help me feel most connected to myself? And which ones disconnect me?
- What values have I outgrown as my primary priorities, or am I now ready to release?
- What labels or roles no longer reflect who I am?
- What forgotten parts of me want to re-emerge?
- What parts of myself am I still waiting to be “ready enough” to share?
- Where am I compromising who I am in order to be who I think I should be?
- What would I choose if I didn’t need to explain it to anyone?
In this context, the best questions aren’t the ones that give us answers. They’re the ones that give us pause and change how we see ourselves. That’s what these are meant to do.
Also, remember that your FAQs aren’t questions designed to be answered once. They’re meant to travel with you.
How do you know you’re asking the right questions?
They don’t just make you think, they help you see.
The right questions about identity and purpose don’t just remind you of who you’ve been. They reconnect you with who you’re becoming. They clarify what matters most to you now and illuminate the next right step.
The result of asking good questions in this domain isn’t a perfect label or a polished personal mission statement.
It’s movement that leads you to a deepening awareness of what gives your life meaning, and a growing sense of alignment between who you are and how you show up in the world.
That’s how you know. You feel less lost in the noise of expectations and more at home in your own story.
A Shift You Might Notice
Sometimes, you’ll revisit a familiar question and discover a completely different answer.
That can be because we move into a different season so we have a definite change in our primary roles. But it can also simply be because we grow. We learn more about ourselves and how we want to interact with our world.
The questions stayed the same. We changed.
And that’s the beauty of these FAQs. They can and will evolve as we do.
As we grow, so will the opportunities for us and the ways we express ourselves.
But it starts with giving ourselves permission to grow. When we give ourselves permission to grow, we allow new perspectives to come into view.
So, here’s a bonus question for our first domain:
- If I gave myself full permission to live on purpose today, what would I do differently?
This Domain’s Additional Resources (Books, Podcasts):
- Awake at the Wheel by Jonathan Fields on Substack and his podcast The Good Life Project.
- Essentialism by Greg McKeown – A powerful reminder that purpose often lives just on the other side of letting go.
- Necessary Endings by Dr. Henry Cloud – One of the most powerful and impactful books I’ve ever read on purposeful change. Something doesn’t have to be broken for it to be ready for change. Just as we prune our plants, we must often let go of what looks like a perfectly good branch so that better ones can emerge and grow.
